My tv was on for the 3 day weekend but my mind was elsewhere….I
watched the NFL playoff games but I was really focused on thoughts on life and just
how truly blessed I am. My family was seriously worried about the results of
the cat scan – the didn’t say much but the pressured silence and minimal
questions spoke for itself. They were elated when I shared that no other procedures
were necessary ….then the questions came; mom just unloaded her tension…I could
hear it in her words. I had to say “what was the worst that the news could be?”
I’ve already dealt with cancer and I have lived on my terms ever since so if it
was “bad news” to the family…I would continue on business as usual. Don’t get
me wrong I still feel like there’s so much more to do but I know that I’m
working things out one day at a time…walking in faith, being true to me and
praising God for the blessings and lessons.
The other thing that I discovered during my “disconnect” is
that I absolutely HATE to hear people harangue and harp on trivial matters….
I got a call that just ravaged and savage my spirit and my
ear…I finally had to just tell the person to shut the hell up and listen for a minute. I
pointed out that they could have the soundest advice ever and that their point
could be impenetrably salient but have they ever asked themselves if the
recipient EVER asked for their help or advice?
I had to ask the person what’s their payoff in feeling like they have to
put on a cape and rescue? I had to ask the person have they ever just sat and
listened without feeling the need to respond. I had to tell the person that my
having to listen to their complaints about others is getting old. I also had to
point out to the individual that they are keeping tabs….counting up what they
feel that they are owed for their service….noting that they got “paid” when the
recipients said “Thank you…” and that rattling off what they do for others is
tacky….like the saying goes “don’t eat with those who will brag about feeding
you” Now, I know we have all done it
from time to time when we feel slighted but when do you recognize that you’re
speaking from some level of wounded pride and bruised ego?
My grandma always said “don’t let the right hand know what
the left hand is doing…” I get it. I don’t let everyone in my business. If I do
something for someone it’s between me and them. If I get angry about something
that person said or did….I check myself first to see why I’m angry. I will also
clearly point out to people - don’t give
me advice unless I ask for help; that doesn’t mean you can’t share your
experiences but I didn’t ask for a lecture on “SHOULDS” it’s my life and my lessons to learn..
How ya livin’?
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