Dream Big By: KB 9 18 15

I was reminded to dream big….I was talking to a friend who was going through a very personal struggle and she shared that she has her good days and her bad days. Our entire conversation was back and forth about the trials and the goodness and mercy of God.

After our conversation I flashed on how I allowed my trials to derail my dreams and how I’ve consistently lived in the spaces between the “hiccups.” I somehow managed to think about Genesis, chapter 41 where Joseph was interpreting the dreams of Pharaoh. In all the exchanges Joseph knew the matter was entirely in the hands of God. God had a purpose for the dream, a purpose for the timing, a purpose for any and all delays.

Joseph was one of many examples of men who seemed to have all the gifts and talents for leadership, but God developed the character and talents over many years. Gifts and talents may be impressive and immediate, but character is what God looks for and always takes time to develop.

Are you working and moving within your calling? Do you trust God’s timing? Are you staying focused? Are you continuously working toward the prize?

How ya livin’?

Your self-worth will impact your worthiness By: KB 9.10.15

I remember a while back  having a conversation with a friend who was rather butt hurt over a failed relationship And in their anger the person said “that’s what I get for trying to make a ho a housewife.”  Needless to say I was floored by the comment. The statement brought up a myriad of questions for me; the first thought was: why would you call someone that you claimed to have feelings for a ho? I then progressed to why would you even consider “wifing” someone who caused you to doubt their fidelity? After all that I finally graduated to what insecurities did you present to put you in such a position? (trust me there had to be a payoff)

I had to take time to collect myself before I spoke to my friend because the individual was in such a dark, angry place but, because I love my friend and I too have been to the place that they were now in, I finally got around to asking the questions that are a cause for personal pause.

The first thing I said was a quote that many of us use but ignore the message as personal advice….the quote is by Maya Angelou “The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them!”  Don’t ever be fooled when people by people TELLING you who they are because self-perception is often deceitful. Actions will reveal character. With that being said I asked my friend to think about the first “red flag” and sure enough something was revealed during the courtship. I then got my friend to start talking about what made them overlook the flag and why they were so invested in the situation and the bottom line was they tended to define themselves by relationship and connection.  Come to find out, my friend had no sense of self-worth and they were willing to settle for a feeling rather than the entirety of a relationship. I had to go to my Bible to share a few things that I used to get me through some craziness in my life when I was in the same emotional state –

Song of Solomon 4:7    You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.

Psalm 139:13-14  For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

Jeremiah 29:11      For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Ephesians 2:10      For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

Does any of this resonate with you at any point in your life? Where are you now?  I shared with my friend that I still get caught up and mess up along the way but I am a bit quicker to cut things off that go in contradiction to who God says I am and attempts to alienate me from whose I am.

How ya livin’ ?

Right Vision BY: KB 9.9.15

Given the story on the Kentucky clerk and her steadfast refusal to issue wedding licenses after the Supreme Court ruling, I feel I must help shed some light on a few misconceptions about Christianity and homosexuality…….please allow me to introduce you to a couple of books that may help those of you who are struggling and those of you who are trapped in a prison of shame and self-loathing based on your religious instructions over the years. The first is: What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality by Daniel A. Helminiak, Ph.D. and the second, Where The Edge Gathers: Building A Community Of Radical Inclusion by Yvette A. Flunder. Both books will help to unravel the misconceptions of faith.

I, however, must add my two cents as only I can and have been known to do! The church has become a house divided full of “saints” and “ain’ts.” I happily identify with the aint’s. So please allow me to elaborate on the two classifications.

The lady in Kentucky would be a saint. This woman is engaged in the practice of literal interpretation of the Bible; a dangerous practice for so many reasons. People who engage in such a practice are more pulled up and uptight than Steve Urkel’s pants. They have assumed a position of the definitive authority and piety and have forgotten that it is by grace that we are saved…works are a byproduct of the grace and the works would not be works of exclusion. There is no hatred in the acts of God…don’t get it twisted the work is constant and we war against our SELFISH desires…I guess the good lady in Kentucky forgot that Romans 7 was written for us all.

The aint’s are the people who know that there is a constant battle to stay in the fold. The ain’ts are full aware of their ADOS - Attention Deficit Ooooo Shiny…disorder. The ain’t know that they are full of insecurities, faults and frailties and we’re constantly leaning on God and our faith to sustain us.

We have to divorce any religion that preaches hate, intolerance and exclusion….go back to your Bible and understand that it is impossible for man to adhere to the strict letter of the Law………..read Galatians 5, read Romans 7 and 8, read Hebrews 2; read it with the understanding that we are not independent operators that we work with and in Christ and Christ is not about exclusion.

Stop justifying your insanity with “love the sinner hate the sin”…..you don’t get to judge…if you love the sinner you would treat him/her as Christ  would and if they are wrong in their actions they will see Christ in yours….

How Ya livin’?!

A Simple Matter of Black and White By: KB 9.6.15

The term Black Power now seems to be considered some type of political terrorist threat. It is viewed as an affront. I’m challenging people, all people, to change their perceptions and cast off their entitlements, anger and whatever baggage or mental slave chains that have you bound , to grasp the concept.

Black Power, as it was taught to me, is a call for African Americans to reclaim their history, their dignity and their voice which they have been stripped of the moment they were ripped from their country’s womb. 

Black Power is a call to shed the mental constructs of colonialism to look to the things that has sustained a culture greater and longer than the 453 years of mental, emotional and physical imprisonment.

Black Power is a call to tear down the invisible fences and borders that this country has learned to disguise. 

Black Power is a call for economic empowerment and fiduciary responsibility.

Black Power is the Call to learn that Africa is the cornerstone of mankind and that our existence as a people, all people, was birthed from the continent.

White Power however is a call of fear…..fear that the male, free, white and 21 is somehow losing a grip on his ability to systematically deny rights and privilege to those people perceived as a threat.

White Power comes from a place of hatred and control. 

White Power is the slave Master picking a choosing slaves on the auction block; a position of power and authority that dictate who will be field hands and who will be allowed in the house.

White Power is the overseer who says who will be punished and how harshly the measure.

White Power is the slave Master that edits and controls what will be learned and manipulates the lessons to serve his interest.

White Power is the mistress (industry) that calls the “buck” to the house to be service and then cries that they have somehow been taken advantage of.

Funny thing is, we as a civilization can embrace and preach Bible truths from Africa…make epic movies about it and yet deny the fact that the people of color ever existed! The same Bible that was being taught to the slave as a standard of conduct was the very same story that was being manipulated and it was assumed that the slave never saw the hypocrisy of the lessons … Matthew 6: 23-24  …23"But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness! 24"No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.

Marinate on that fact this Sunday as you sing your hymns.

How ya livin’ ?!

F The Police (Don't get mad...read it!!!!) By: KB 9.1.15

REAL TALK from KB: If I see one more pro cop post I’m going to lose my mind….no offense to all of you who support them but none of my interactions with cops in uniform have been positive….starting from my teens in NY. I’ve noticed that the majority of people who have been posting the pics are my Caucasian friends…..so let me share a few things to help you understand why there is no appreciation on my part.

Cops are trained and programmed to racially profile plain and simple. Blacks and Mexican are disproportionately stopped and detained in their everyday lives; hence the phrase ________ while Black.

As a teen I was riding my friends bike, I was cat called by a tow truck driver who told me to “come here”. I’m thinking this fool is a perv until the cops roll up on me. The tow truck driver claimed I’m riding a bike stolen out of his garage…(all this from a slight glance from a moving truck several feet away.) I explain to the cop I’m on a friend’s bike….but the tow truck driver is going on and on about “you people” so me and the bike are swooped up until my friend can show up with the documentation for the bike. I was presumed guilty because this man said so. No one stopped to ask my parents a damn thing…no apology from the cop or the truck driver in the inappropriate way he approached the situation.

Fast forward a few years in my early 20’s in Cali….I’m in the DMV parking lot. PARKED! I’m sitting in the car waiting to take my road test. I look up and there are cops with lights flashing, asking how and why’s about the car. Their reason for the funky treatment? The registration sticker is upside down.

My sister is involved in a hit and run with my mother in the car. Someone sees the incident and my sister following the driver to get the insurance information. It gets reported that there’s a high speed chase and my sister is the aggressor. The teenage girl (who is Caucasian is the person that hit and took off) The cops question my mother and sister until they see the damage done to the car and the little girl nervously talked too much and told on herself.

My mother lives in a gated community and I was waiting outside the gate because she wasn’t home yet. I had a dog in my car and I let him out to go take care of his business….a couple drives past and see me sitting in my PARKED car and I could see them periodically peek out of their blinds….15 minutes later the cops roll up on me. They ran my mother’s address to confirm my story.

I’ve been talked to like I was the devil’s own when I asked why I was being detained (which is my right mind you).

I was trained to do retail asset protections and I found myself following the presumed “unwritten” mind you, guidelines of racial profiling and then was taught not to mention race in reporting…..I found myself buying into a group mindset oh a let me mention that cops are disrespectful to asset protections folks as well because they are not a “real” part of the “brotherhood” …hood (as in KKK)  being the operative word…

So pardon me when I say what NWA was bold enough to proclaim on wax F____ THE POLICE! They’re often the people escalating the problem….ask any brother or sister that has ever been victimized or brutalized because of they dared to have melanin or know their rights.

To all my Caucasian friends posting – you can keep telling yourselves that people are locked up because they must have deserved it but you know that’s not always true….people are often framed and evidence is concocted and or lost…. A disingenuous and scripted "I’m sorry" and a check  is supposed to make up for 20 and 30 years of life and trauma from being in prison Reuben “Hurricane” Carter ring a bell? (movie was made about it.)

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2015/04/07/1376122/-Three-black-men-convicted-as-teens-exonerated-released-in-Ohio-after-serving-20-years-in-prison#

http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/2014/12/dallas-man-who-served-31-years-in-prison-for-a-rape-he-didnt-commit-finally-declared-innocent.html/

http://abcnews.go.com/US/men-walk-free-40-years-prison-crime-commit/story?id=27095382

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/06/20/nyregion/5-exonerated-in-central-park-jogger-case-are-to-settle-suit-for-40-million.html?_r=0

 I know not all cops are bad cops but I haven’t met any good ones while in uniform and you have never had to be defendant about your very existence 24/7 . We are constantly asking don’t brutalize or kill us and most of America continues to ask why we're asking.....