I haven’t written anything of substance in a while; I've
been taking time out for me, spending time in thought and reflection. I've been
toying with the word studies on both grace and humility. I had to look at some
recent triumphs as well as some MAJOR setbacks and poor choices based on my
imposing self-will over God’s will; more important my ability to confuse and
rationalize the two. I then had to ask myself if I had friends or if I was
courting minions. All of which are very tough question to ask as well as answer…self
examination is NEVER an easy task.
1 Peter 4:3
For the time that is past suffices for doing what the Gentiles want to
do, living in sensuality, passions, drunkenness, orgies, drinking parties, and
lawless idolatry.
What have I done with my life and myself since I have come
into the knowledge of Christ? What have I done to acknowledge His call and
purpose for my life? Am I living in the flesh? Do I continue to be selfish and
self-serving? There is no one question…each question leads to another they are
all interconnected.
On some levels my answers were less than stellar and
celestial minded. I had to confess a lot of faults and missteps and I had to
repent. I had to look and myself and the company (counsel)I kept and didn't
keep. I had to look at the how’s and why’s of how the situation came to be.
I am by no means a zealot or an extreme fundamentalist. I am
someone who loves God and wants to live an upright life of integrity. I am
someone who wants to be known for their
love, compassion and empathy. I want to be known and remembered as a
person who loved and helped others in/out of season. I want to be known as a
person of faith.
I realize I am human and I am going to miss my mark, often! I
must learn to forgive myself, brush myself off and move on. Please note.....I did not say
forget the lesson
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