A friend recently asked if I was angry about a situation
that I’d shared. I had to admit that when the situation first “jumped off” I
was hotter than chicken grease…but then I had the wherewithal to look at how I
placed myself smack dab in the middle of the insanity. Poor choices, poor
boundaries, rationalizing and justifying what I knew, deep down in my being, that
wasn't for me but I allowed my weaknesses and deficits to speak louder. So I
had no right to be angry….if I was angry it should be with me!
I then took the thoughts a step further and asked myself….how
could I preach Christ and harbor resentment…the two cannot exist in the same
home….like Isaac and Ishmael (Genesis
16)
…..sometimes you just have to exhale and thank God you lived to tell about
it!!!
I've been working hard on a few projects and really giving
thought to a few things as we approach Easter. I have to say that every time I
read Oswald Chambers I am forced to conform something about myself; as I've
said I've read this book many times but at this stage in my life ol’ Ozzie just
really speaks to me.
If we are not heedful and pay no attention to the way the Spirit of God
works in us, we will become spiritual hypocrites. We see where other people are
failing, and then we take our discernment and turn it into comments of ridicule
and criticism, instead of turning it into intercession on their behalf.
How many of us watch other people flounder and yet refuse to
share our faith? How many times have you heard someone so far off base
spiritually and you make no attempt to put them back on the path? I’m not
talking about being a Bible-thumping repent or die type person… I’m talking
about sharing your experience in love and genuine concern…
The other thing that I have noticed is that we give
lip-service to faith and what God can and will do in our lives. We’ll talk
about the blood and the power in our sleep but we don’t apply the power to our
lives…
We fear people seeing the hypocrisy in our lives but what
about what we demonstrate to God on a consistent basis?
You know the saying “the truth shall set you free”…well,
before it does it will usually make you angry because you’re forced to look at
some rather unflattering behaviors. Allow me to elucidate on a couple of things
that came to mind over the weekend.
I’m going to expose two types of people and really give you
cause to pause and think about why some people are draining, why you can’t seem
to get ahead or why you have no verve…think about what I’m sharing and make the
necessary adjustments.
You ever run into someone who just steadfastly refuses to
apologize? Some people are bold enough to say flat out that they’re not going
to do it but for the most part we encounter the people who blame the other
party. These people are so adept at avoiding their “SH-TUFF” that they have
blaming down to an art form. I seem to
attract these people even though I coat myself in bull- puckey repellent and
hang no-pest strips on a regular basis. I can’t imagine the level of pain and
self-loathing that prevents people from acknowledging they’re wrong. Saying the
words must trigger an avalanche of insecurities and pains.
My friendships are not based on my always saying and doing
the right thing. My friends love me in spite of my faults and flaws. I usually
come riding into their lives on a cloud of inappropriates, weaknesses and
flaws. I’ll announce them in some form of self-deprecation. My friends see past
all this madness and they push me to be my best and support me in my weakness.
I strive to reciprocate.
The other type of person that’s hard to be around is the
individual who suffers from “terminal uniqueness” Terminal uniqueness is the
belief that the situation the individual is facing is unlike anything
faced by other people. Terminal uniqueness is the pattern of behavior that
keeps you stuck in the “woe is me” and makes it possible to utilize every
excuse and justification known to man – because you've convinced yourself “YOU’RE
THE ONLY ONE”….
To these two types of folks I say GET OVER YOURSELVES!!!! Your thoughts are selfish and
self-centered…you’re not the only person in the world and the world doesn't
revolve around you. People are going to do what they do, how they do, when they
want to do it….are you really so paranoid to believe that everyone and
everything has singled you out to inflict something upon your person?
Like I said the other day….I’m learning to relax by letting
people be themselves. I don’t need to identify what type of animal left the
poop…my job is not to step in it and to avoid the animal…plain and simple
So I’m sitting here after reading my devotionals and working
on my various blog posts. My various devotionals and blog posts got me to
thinking and God started dealing with me
through His word….man oh man…you know some days I just want to be lazy
and just check out but my love for God and my dedication to my writing often
prompts me to elucidate and illuminate (nice $2 college words) on my thoughts.
Here’s how God spoke to my spirit today….Protestant might
want to look to the Catholics on the subject of confession. Oh, I know some
folks who can pray like their life depended and truth be told it does. I know
some people who are blessed with the unique ability to usher in the Holy
Spirit. I know people who can sing like an angel in praise. But all these
qualities are for naught if we cannot confess and I have to say that I was born
into a Protestant family and I have praised and prayed in the Protestant traditions
for the majority of my life but I have yet to hear anyone, from childhood to
now, really spend any amount of time discussing the significance of confession.
For the most part I've been taught that confession is between you and God, like
it’s a secret society… Confession very well may be a personal matter but when
we sin it’s usually out in the open with justification and rationalization to
make it palatable for the masses.
James 5:16 Therefore,
confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be
healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
Psalm 32:5 I
acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will
confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and you forgave the iniquity of my
sin. Selah
Acts 19:18 Also
many of those who were now believers came, confessing and divulging their
practices.
Psalm 32:2 Blessed
is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose
spirit there is no deceit.
I often catch myself in fault during the course of my day
and I am starting to develop the habit of prayer when I do catch myself…I’m
challenging you to do the same. You’ll be surprised just how many times a day
that you’ll be engaging in prayer.
I just want to take a second to share my “cause for pause”
for today….and once again I had to turn the spotlight on myself…not to shine
but to expose.
Y’all every do something with good intentions but also had
motives and expectations? I recently had the experience….and let’s just say God
had the final say. I know this sounds really vague and confusing but let me try
to clarify my truth.
I started out with a very good motive but I really wanted
something to happen….I had an unspoken expectation: I wanted something and I
wouldn't take God’s no for the answer because I WANTED… I just overrode the
Holy Spirit..
I just read something this morning, Our Daily Bread, about
Satan taking on the form of an angel: Like
sounds, messages can be replicated. One of Satan’s most frequently used
techniques is that of replicating messages in spiritually dangerous ways. Paul
warns in 2 Corinthians 11:13-14, “For such are false apostles, deceitful
workers, transforming themselves into apostles of Christ. And no wonder! For
Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light.”
I had listened, I bit and I was out of the will of God in
the situation…..
I’m saying all this to say that God yet again spared me but
what I (we) must learn is to really embrace the will and the ways of God
because we might get a chance to get the lesson the next time………
Grandma always said “tell the truth and shame the devil”…I
can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard or used the phrase myself….
In my attempts to walk my talk it’s time to be real, raw and
100% transparent ….I used my grandma’s phrase because I tend to dwell in our 51st
state, the state of denial. So let me burst my own bubble of some of my intermittent
insights…
Hi, I’m KB and I’m a hopeless romantic, which translates to
(love addict)…which is not necessarily a bad thing but I have to say in my case
it is….please note…love addiction in my case has nothing to do with sex…it’s an
emotional set up: “Love addiction is a
human behavior in which people become addicted to the feeling of being in love.Love
addicts can take on many different behaviors. Love addiction is
common; however, most love addicts do not realize they are addicted to love…”
Wikipedia defines love addiction as follows: A common process of falling into love
addiction begins when a person begins to feel sympathy with another person
after going through an initially innocent moment of attraction and
automatically idealizes the other to the point of divinity. The individual is
then blindly attached to the other person, becoming incapable of making a
realistic analysis of the situation; they may project all kinds of illusions
onto the other person, believing them to be the only one that can bring
happiness. This process can be very quick. There are, however, those who never
go past this stage of blind love, and remain 'addicted to people, sucking on
them and gobbling them up...parasitism, not love'.
I can emphatically say that I do not idealize the object of
my affection to the point of divinity…and I am fully capable of making
realistic analysis and can/will call the individual out when need be….I’m more
addicted to the euphoric feeling and trying to maintain that “high” if you
will. I’m more of a codependent for maintaining happiness….I’m not minimizing
it’s an illness and I am recognizing how it manifests itself and how I feed and
nurture the madness……….
REAL TALK: My need to
“keep” the happy leads me to unhappy people so in essence there is never going
to be a balance or reciprocity….
I am content with
being by myself , waiting on and listening to God; I am no longer willing to
take on someone else’s character defects
while neglecting what needs to be healed in my life
Can you look at and
address your character defects?
My Utmost for His Highest has got me yet again….check it
out:
Goodness and purity
should never be traits that draw attention to themselves, but should simply be
magnets that draw people to Jesus Christ. If my holiness is not drawing others
to Him, it is not the right kind of holiness; it is only an influence which awakens
undue emotions and evil desires in people and diverts them from heading in the
right direction. A person who is a beautiful saint can be a hindrance in
leading people to the Lord by presenting only what Christ has done for him,
instead of presenting Jesus Christ Himself. Others will be left with this
thought— “What a fine person that man is!” That is not being a true “friend of
the bridegroom”— I am increasing all the time; He is not.
Have you ever met someone who does not present Christianity
in a good light? Unfortunately I know far too many people who are so “saved”
that they are no Earthly good. Y’all know the people who have an itemized list
of every offense that will send you to hell or are so miserable to be around
because they have misused their position and they sit in judgment of folks who
don’t know enough to seek to please God and they spend all their time trying to
please this individual?
I not too long ago had someone tell me about their position
on MY sexuality….I didn't ask
them mind you …but their quote was “ I was told that the righteous will scarcely
make it into heaven”
Hmmmmmmmmm, so, what I heard was this person assume the
position of righteousness and that I’m not in the number of people entering the
pearly gates…all of which was hanging on a judgment.
Now, let me be perfectly
clear on my position, trust and believe I have one…1) I didn't ask for or seek
validation from this person because I’m watching and making note that they have
placed themselves in a position to be followed and then leave people hanging…2)
I have no desire to be in a heaven that has harsh criticisms and “sometimey”
help…the God I know is about love and forgiveness….I’m about that heaven!
We all need to watch what we say and what we do because we
may be the only Bible that someone reads.
I'm just sitting here deep in thought before I put my next
motivational blog in the "saved" file. I have the television watching
me as I type and do my laundry, which has been ready to go for over a week but
I've been too busy to do....long story short, something made me take pause.
First a Donnell Jones song lyric just sort of ticker taped
across my mind....
"But when you love someone ....You just don't
treat them bad"
Too many of us are walking wounded with the deepest cuts
coming at the hands of "loved ones"....which brings me to the title
of this post. I ask that you bear with me as I mentally muse and bounce around
in font...I promise it will all come together and make sense.
I dug up this quote
because my mother would often say it like a mantra. The full quote is "No
good deed goes unpunished." I never figured out just what the heck she was
talking about until now as I sit feeling some sort of crazy way and I was mentally and emotionally prompted to
look up the exact meaning of the quote.
The quote breaks down as follows: Beneficial actions
often go unappreciated or are met with outright hostility.
If they are appreciated, they often lead to additional requests.
Now back to my point...we get wounded because we approach
situations with expectations hanging on
them. Oftentimes deep in our hearts and psyche we know that the other party is
incapable of or has no intentions on meeting the expectation yet we go all in
with reckless abandon..
Check or express your expectations and be open and real
about what you're willing to give as well as receive ...
OK, I said I wasn't going to watch it because it just seemed
so base….I got caught up because everywhere I went everyone was talking about
it and they seemed so animated and engrossed in their conversations. I bit. I
drank the Kool -aid. I got into the melee.
About two weekends back…I watched all the episodes to get
caught up and you know what?!! I was right…Empire is popular because it appeals
to our base instincts….and that’s about 12 hours of my life that I can’t get
back! I get the hype…..the network wanted the ratings and wanted to appeal to a
younger demographic but let’s look at the subliminal messages and stereotypes
that are being perpetuated.
Lucious (Terrence Howard) – the angry Black male that is a physically
abusive, manipulative brute that cannot contain his sexual appetites. A man
that seeks power but often has to hide behind the skirts of a woman to obtain
the position.
Cookie (Taraji P. Henson) – the angry sister-girl, friend,
that support everyone but will go “ghetto” to obtain a position of power.
Objectified, sexual and sensual to obtain power.
Andre (Trai Byers) – Black, Joe College overachiever who
tries to divorce himself from his past and people yet returns because he knows
his education will elevate him and his position working with the very people he
disassociates and disconnects from.
Jamal (Jussie Smollett) the classic gay stereotype- trying
to prove his manhood by overcompensating; sexuality driven story line like the
character is just a sexuality and not a person with a real life.
Hakeem (Bryshere Y.
Gray) an angry Black youth that’s all about money, jewelry, sex, drugs
and alcohol….no substance of character or moral compass.
Seriously folks, there is a faction of people who take TV
characters to heart….and to be perfectly honest with you there is just enough
truth in each character to add credence to the stereotypes. I've seen enough!!!
I can’t condone or accept the hype for my people…..where are the teenagers
struggling with the angst of college prep? Where are the single mothers who get
up and go to work every day, trying to make a dollar out of 15₵ ? Where are the
fathers that are the head of households? Where are the churches and
barbershops? Where are the lifelong neighborhood friends?
We’re seeing a rise in blatant racism because on some levels
we add to it…..did you hear Common, speak on race? REALLY?!!! How about Pharrell
? The younger generation is so concerned
about $’s and “brand” that they refuse to address the real and raw. Where are
the Harry Belafonte’s, Paul Robeson’s and Eartha Kitt’s …hell I’d even settle
for the chaos of Tupac and the militancy of Sista Souljah, KRS-1 and Paris……….
2 Corinthians 4:4
In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the
unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of
Christ, who is the image of God.
2 Corinthians 4:3-4
And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled only to those who are
perishing. In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the
unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of
Christ, who is the image of God.
Romans 8:7-8
For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not
submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are in the flesh cannot
please God.
Matthew 13:15
For this people's heart has grown dull, and with their ears they can
barely hear, and their eyes they have closed, lest they should see with their
eyes and hear with their ears and understand with their heart and turn, and I
would heal them.’
Anyone who knows me, has spent any time with me knows that I
am big on manners and common courtesy; you will also know that I am also big on
acknowledging wrongs and apologizing. I often struggle with interacting with people
who just go on with business as usual and never apologizing or acknowledging
the things they said or did. THAT IS SOOOOOOOOOO NOT THE BUSINESS!!! I will
converse with the person and I will be who I am but I always have it in my mind
that this person has shown me just exactly who they are….you know like, you can
handle a poisonous snake but you must always be mindful of the fact that it is
a poisonous snake.
The aforementioned was my epiphany for the day. I get so
hung up on why people don’t apologize because I am looking at things from my
perspective and with my expectations and I have just come to embrace the fact
that they aren't there yet. Apologies are not part of everyone’s process. Some
people are still functioning and driven to function by past hurts and their
inability to apologize or lack of humility serves them in some way. I understand hurts but how I get past my
hurts is that I understand empathy and compassion…I’m able to acknowledge that
I do not want anyone to receive emotional baggage that has been given to me
over my lifetime. So I can take ownership of MY stuff.
The other piece that became very clear that there are two
types of people that I’m addressing…there are the people who just don’t get
God, His provision and their purpose in relation to the two. They don’t know
better and they can’t hope for better.
We must also learn to recognize the snakes as well and if
you choose to engage, handle with the utmost care.
1 Corinthians 13:1
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am
a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic
powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all
faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If
I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have
not love, I gain nothing.
James 2:13 For
judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over
judgment.
Matthew 7:1-29
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce
you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.
Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the
log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take
the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite,
first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take
the speck out of your brother's eye. ...
Romans 14:12-13
So then each of us will give an account of himself to God. Therefore let
us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put
a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.
I had a major revelation the other day…….I have to say that
it was birthed out of anger but it didn't stop God from revealing truth…so I
can celebrate in the fact that I received the lesson. So let me tell you how it
went down… I’m in a “team building” exercise and things were being revealed
that had nothing to do with team building…it was a venting session but rather
than people stay on the subject of themselves and what they needed to do, it
became a blame and attack session…and of course, yours truly was on the
receiving end of some of the “informative exchange.” I’m not saying that I wasn’t
guilty of some of the charges. I can hear that info, but, when it’s delivered
in the way that you’re charging me with…does it not lose something in the
translation? I’m just sayin’….. Needless to say I left the event a “little”
angry because of the hypocrisy and emptiness in the exchange…. But on my drive
home as I was absentmindedly staring off into space, I noticed a building that
had an odd mixture of architecture. The building core structure was made of
this old school brick, solid and stately and the new façade was glass and steel…to
me it looked a bit shaky. Which leads me to my thought……what is your authentic
self?
Have you ever given thought to your authentic self? What is
your truth? How do you talk to and treat people? I go back to the “team
building exercise” the core issues were never addressed because it involved
addressing some character defects that go beyond the situation.
I have to say that I got angry because I knew that I was
hearing my “truths” from an unclean spirit and heart; they were my truths
nonetheless and I had to deal with myself and what I was hearing. Now, some may say that I am running someone’s
inventory and I will say yes, I am and I was given permission the moment I was
approached in hypocrisy; please believe that I will deal with my issues but I’m
going to call out the spirit of untruth in the actions. I thank God for His
spirit of discernment because I was able to cut through all the noise and hear
the message that was meant for me which only goes to show the power of THE
LIVING GOD. I heard what I needed to hear – God spoke and I heard……but more was
revealed in the message – hence the scripture selection.
Some of you may remember this…for you youngsters I will have
to explain.
Back in the day long distance phone calls used to cost a ton
of money. You used to only get a long distance call because something heavy
duty had happened. As the cost decreased, it was still a burden for the working
stiff, we learned a magic phrase for the lucky individual who was blessed
enough to handle the cost…. “REVERSE THE CHARGES”
Unfortunately some of us have taken something that was
supposed to be beneficial and learned how to use and abuse it. I say this
because we have learned how to REVERSE THE CHARGES when we've done something
wrong. We've become astute at blaming others or skirting responsibility by
justifying and rationalizing our poor choices and behavior. We dismiss people
and situations like their part of a movie script. We talk about communication
and building bridges but unfortunately the bridges are the backs of people that
we've stepped on to get to the next person.
I have been guilty of all of the above…I have to say I
approach things differently now. When things start to get shaky, and begin to
fall apart, when red flags start waving in the breeze, I immediately get by
myself and pray for direction. I am compelled to follow the word of God….
Matthew 5: 21- 24 21 “You
have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and
whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you
that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to
judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and
whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire. 23 So
if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your
brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before
the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer
your gift.
When things erode can and do you look at the part you played
in the progression? Do you apologize?
Now there are going to be times in life where an apology
that you expect will never come but don’t let that change you…take ownership of
YOUR part, apologize and confess…repent and move on. If an individual chooses
to hold on to anger, assign blame, hold a grudge, etc…. it is none of your
business at this point. If you know that your apology was sincere and you have confess
and repented for your part…pray for the other person, praise God for yourself
and move on!
Matthew 7: 5-6 …5"
You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see
clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye.6 "Do not give what is
holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample
them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.
1 Timothy 2:3-5 …3 This is good and acceptable in the
sight of God our Savior, 4 who desires all men to be saved and to come to
the knowledge of the truth. 5 For there is one God, and one mediator also
between God and men, the man Christ Jesus,…
I have heard both of these passages of scripture repeatedly
for most of my life. I've heard them used in and out of the proper context over
a period of time. I most recently had my own experience with the passage of
Matthew.
I have to say that I am not always mindful of scripture. I
periodically practice the fine art of rationalization and justification and I
go deep with it. But for the most part I am straight forward with my “insanity”;
majority of family and friends will tell you that if I say I’m going to do
something you can best believe it will get done! With that being said, I was
upfront about what I was doing and what I wanted to happen….it was my will and
not God’s but I have to say I didn't hide or veil it in any way. Now, please
don’t get me wrong , I am by no means glorifying myself or my actions…wrong is
wrong…but I was so off into my stuff that I didn't grasp the entire situation;
I didn't look at the big picture. The situation blew up in a very big way
because I was off on my cloud asking God to honor something that He could not
and in the meantime I’m “casting my pearls.”
God was already dealing with my head and heart in the
situation but I overrode the conviction and did “that thing” any way….and now I’m
like FEMA accessing the self-inflicted damage. I get it Lord…my hypocrisy and double
minded approach to what I know to be true will NOT be blessed. I cannot serve
me and serve you as well…..as my Catholic friends pray “ I am heartily sorry
for having offended thee” my most humble
and sincere apologies to the victims who got caught my shrapnel spray…
Lessons learned: I cannot operate on self-will no matter how
honest I am about my intentions and actions.
I cannot expect others to respect my faith walk and
experience if they do not share the same set of beliefs and constructs.
There is probably nothing bigger, more divisive more
tolerated or more widespread in the Christian world than the sin of legalism. I
know some of you are clutching your pearls to see me it labeled it and call it
out as a sin. People who practice legalism are thought to be a bit overzealous
or “uptight,” but they aren't usually thought of as sinning in the same sense
as adulterers, thieves, liars, and the like. To the contrary, legalists seem to
be concerned about holiness. Legalists tend to refer to themselves as righteous
and become so pompous and pious that they are no Earthly good!
I’m bringing this topic up for two reasons:
1)Many of you watch the show Empire. I refused to
watch it early on because I just wasn't feeling the hip-hop soundtrack. I hate
what rap has become…but that’s not germane to the point I’m trying to
make. I want to highlight a connection
between a couple of characters Lucious (Terrence Howard) and Jamal (Jussie
Smollett) ….the relationship between the two characters best illustrate the
relationship between gays and the Black church. The church loves you as a choir
member, a choir director, a praise dancer, an usher…any position of servitude
but do not dare to say that you’re called in any capacity….then you’re an abomination!
You are loved when you’re relegated to a second class citizen. You are loved as
long as you stay at the kids table…but you are an unwelcome guest at the
welcome table.
This leads me to my second point…..I know I’m going to hear
and feel some things behind this post but I have to challenge some static and
staid thinking. Please note….I AM NOT
CHANGING ANYTHING ABOUT THE GOSPEL…..I’M CHALLENGING THINKING ABOUT
APPLICATION!
2)I was born into a Baptist family and learned, embraced and
applied Baptist doctrine to my faith walk for many years…but I began to
question some of what I was hearing from the pulpit when I heard one Pastor
preach a very thinly veiled message with a segregationist point of view (this
is in the 80’s y’all). I had just moved to Cali and I was living in a little
farm community…culture shock on so many levels, coming from NY and living with
cows and cowboys. I sought refuge in the church. I heard more “nigger” jokes or
jokes about race at the church than I ever heard on the streets of NY. I can also remember a few AIDS jokes and
sermons. While people were sick and dying I’m hearing about Sodom and God’s
retribution from the pulpit….not once did I hear about loving, caring and
helping.
Where am I going with this? Well, I’ll share….my former
Pastor, who I love dearly, was invited to speak at a Baptist function and now
there’s a move to rescind the invitation because they feel she’s a threat to “family
values” because she’s a same gender loving person. Can I say …get the heck out of here?!!! Now,
I can say that in order to even invite Dr. Flunder you had to have someone who
knew of her, her background and her theological perspective. Let’s keep it 100%
honest and transparent….there are a few members who wield $’s and a form of legalism
that you aren't willing to take on for the sake of “keeping a tenuous peace” until something else makes the legalism list rather
than follow the scriptures and teachings of Christ “come let us reason together
– Isaiah 1:18”
Now, I have been approached by the many factions of the
Pharisees, Sadducees and the Sanhedrin in discussion on the validity of my
faith, calling and purpose….I let them talk and continue on in my faith, my
purpose and calling…..I’m not going to enter into a conversation with someone
who is not willing to converse. My time here is accounted for and I don’t get
rollover minutes for nonsense.
Just remember y’all 1 Corinthians 13:1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of
angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
Y’all know how I love the devotional My Utmost For His
Highest; I've shared that I've read it from cover to cover many times and like
the Bible. Each time I read it I get more insight and once again Oswald
Chambers did not disappoint:
Beware of surrender that is motivated by personal benefits that may
result. For example, “I’m going to give myself to God because I want to be
delivered from sin, because I want to be made holy.” Being delivered from sin
and being made holy are the result of being right with God, but surrender
resulting from this kind of thinking is certainly not the true nature of
Christianity.
Wrestle with that until it blesses you….I know I am!
Psalm 103:10-14
He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according
to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is
his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the
west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows
compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear
him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.
Psalm 32:5 I
acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will
confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and you forgave the iniquity of my
sin. Selah
Mark 11:25 And
whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so
that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”
Ephesians 4:32
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in
Christ forgave you.
One of the hardest things I ever had to do in this life is
to learn to forgive. I embrace it now because I am learning about and loving
the character of Christ; but early on Man! Oh Man! I hated the feeling of
vulnerability. I felt like I was leaving myself open to be sucker punched…..and
I was, but in a good way (wait, is there such a thing as a good sucker
punch?) Oh, well I’ll explain….
Where I’m from forgiveness was just a word. I come from a
place of justice and being hard. I come from a place where smacking someone
around would put things in right standing. I come from a place where
forgiveness means you’re soft and it gives people permission to mistreat you.
I still struggle with feeling vulnerable but not with
forgiveness…..I release people from their transgressions because what I learned
is that I was the one who was carrying the weight. Seriously, think about it,
people get so comfortable doing what they do, that their lives just go on,
business as usual. We are the ones mumbling grumbling singing that Michael
Jackson “Do you remember the time?...”
Let it go!
If something hurt you learn from the pain…I know it sound
crazy…but think about it like your body. If your body signals you with a pain
you’d most likely try figure out what’s wrong and then make the necessary
adjustments, right? It’s the same with forgiveness…..what is the situation that
caused the riff or hurt trying to teach you? What part did you play in it? Make
the adjustments and move on…
Now, back to my “sucker punch” …forgiveness is a blessing
plain and simple!
Please note you can be as “saved” as you want to be….but if
you hold a grudge the Bible is clear God will not forgive you…so then how are
you saved? I hope y’all get the lesson!
Your heart is truly released when you learn to release….amen!!!
I am truly grateful to
all the people who have taken the time to read my blog. It is my prayer that my
words will continue to be a blessing; I pray that my words will challenge your
thoughts and perceptions about your ability to make a change or a difference in
the world.
Psalm 34:18 The Lord is
near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
Psalm 147:3 He
heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds
John 12:24 Truly,
truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it
remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your
own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight
your paths.
I like to stay “vaguely personal” in my blog posting because
I’m a major introvert. I don’t want too many people assuming they know me when
I don’t put myself out there to be known. I do share my life experiences
without exposing or incriminating (depends on how you want to look at it)
others. Today, however, I’m going to put myself out there….laundry on the line…
The aforementioned scripture has an underlying theme, BROKENNESS
AND/OR FRAGILITY!!!
That’s me personified.
Initially, I can say that I wasn't broken because of Christ and
identifying with the suffering. Initially, I was broken and crushed because of
stubbornness, disobedience and self-will. I was praying for a change in a
situation and not for a change in me….you know that old familiar prayer “thy
kingdom come, my will be done” and in the middle of the prayer God dealt with
me. My change came. I wish I could tell you that the transformation was
comfortable but I can’t. Like a kid and his security blanket…I held on to my
stuff like my life depended on it. My life did depend on it…but it was
dependent upon my releasing so God could supply in proper order….I had come to
understand the passage in Job
Job 13: 14-16 …14 "Why
should I take my flesh in my teeth And put my life in my hands? 15 "Though
He slay me, I will hope in Him. Nevertheless I will argue my ways before Him. 16
"This also will be my salvation, For a godless man may not come before His
presence.…
It’s a struggle to be in discomfort and in a character press
but it is also an honor and a blessing to be considered by God. Brokenness,
frailties, fear and insecurity are where God displays His power and might…..God
uses ordinary people !
The foundation for any genuine, long-lasting relationship is
biblical love; this love is often confused with emotion. Love will bring about emotion
and emotional caring; love is important
and we all need to feel it because God has designed us way, . . . but true
biblical love is not and never should be based on emotion.
Biblical love is based on God's grace; His unmerited favor.
In other words, God in His own heart decided to that He wanted the very best of
us. He choose to care for us as Rom. 5:8, says "when we were still in our
sins." God choose to love us, not based upon some goodness or trait He
liked in us, but because He cared for
our well being and future. Thus, God's grace is an expression of his
will....to love us, because He choose to.
Any true lasting relationship must be based on grace.
God made us to need one another. When we fail in our
relationship and fail to exercise biblical grace and love one to another we
become lonely and loneliness is a terrible condition.
There is EMOTIONAL loneliness that occurs when we lose
connection with the true essence of grace. This is a loneliness that can occur
in the midst of a crowd. This is the most common type of loneliness. It occurs
when we feel we have no one to share our deepest concerns, no one who truly
understands our struggles or our joys.
I have often allowed the devil of emotional loneliness to
lead me to some really depressing situations with disastrous outcomes. The
solution to the problem of loneliness is friendship. All human beings are
designed with both a need and craving
for friendship. We need someone who will rejoice with us or cry with us,
someone who will comfort us when we crawl through valleys of despair or laugh
with us on the mountaintops of happiness.
We need someone who is an ever present companion through the
ins and outs of the daily grind, someone we can always count on. In fact,
friendships can be our most valuable possessions. The poet, Emily Dickenson,
wrote "My friends are my
estate."
Every human being needs friendships on two different levels.
We need HORIZONTAL (Earthly) friendships. We need deep meaningful
connections with other people. The proverb says, "A man that hath friends
must shew himself friendly." (Prov. 18:24)
In other words, we have to diligently work on building long
lasting and endearing friendships. Do you work on building friendships with
others or let it happen; go with the flow and then just walk away telling
ourselves that an individual was in our lives for a season?
True friendship can never be one sided. Too many of us, are looking for friends who will help them,
meet their need, be a friend to them, listen to their problems, be sympathetic
and love them. They are seeking a selfish friendship in which they receive
friendship....but often this is a one-sided affair. I know I am a good friend but I am often guilty of looking
for someone to validate me.
People do not often find the friends they want and remain
lonely and wonder why? The KEY is in this verse. To have friends we must show
ourselves to be friendly. Are your friendships one-sided? Can you look at your
shortcomings in the situation? To find true friends we must UNSELFISHLY give
ourselves to others.
Let me emphasize the that true friendship is not based on
getting, but giving. Many people, (me)
have a hard time finding true friendship
because they are looking for what someone can do for them. They want people to
love and care for them....and they fail because that is not the basis of true
friendship. True friendship is like God’s grace....and His love it is giving
unmerited favor to someone and first and foremost wanting to meet their need,
to help them, to comfort them.
In giving friendship
it is returned. The satisfaction of friendship...is in being a friend to
others. .
We need a VERTICAL friendship. The basis of any sound
lasting relationship begins with a relationship with our Creator and God. The
second part of our verse says, "There is a friend that sticketh
closer than a brother." That friend is Jesus Christ. Unless you have
a personal friendship with Jesus, you'll never escape loneliness. Exodus 33:11
says,
"And the LORD spake unto Moses face to face, as a man
speaketh unto his friend."
James 2:23 says, "And the scripture was fulfilled
which saith, Abraham believed God, and it was imputed unto him for
righteousness: and he was called the Friend of God."
Jesus said to His disciples in John 15:15, "
Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord
doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my
Father I have made known unto you."
Matthew 8:23-27 ESV
And when he got into the boat, his disciples followed him. And behold,
there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the
waves; but he was asleep. And they went and woke him, saying, “Save us, Lord; we
are perishing.” And he said to them, “Why are you afraid, O you of little
faith?” Then he rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great
calm. And the men marveled, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even winds
and sea obey him?”
Acts 27:20 ESV
When neither sun nor stars appeared for many days, and no small tempest
lay on us, all hope of our being saved was at last abandoned.
Matthew 14:22-27 ESV Immediately he made the disciples get
into the boat and go before him to the other side, while he dismissed the
crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by
himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but the boat by this
time was a long way from the land, beaten by the waves, for the wind was
against them. And in the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on
the sea. But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were
terrified, and said, “It is a ghost!” and they cried out in fear. ...
1. God is sovereign over the storms of life.
The biblical doctrine of God’s sovereignty over all things
is one of the most practical truths for us to apply in times of trial.
A. WHEN THINGS ARE OUT OF OUR CONTROL, THEY ARE NEVER OUT OF
GOD’S CONTROL, NO MATTER HOW HUMANLY IMPOSSIBLE THE SITUATION. (Act 27: 15 -20)
B. WE AREN'T NECESSARILY OUT OF GOD’S WILL WHEN WE
GET CAUGHT IN A STORM. (Acts 23:11)
C. WE AREN'T EVER
OUT OF GOD’S CARE WHEN WE GET CAUGHT IN A STORM. ( 1 Peter 5:6-7)
2. Our responsibility in the storms of life is to trust openly in God’s
care for us.
A. TO TRUST OPENLY IN GOD’S CARE IS NOT OPPOSED TO USING CAUTION
AND COMMON SENSE.
(Acts 27:25)
B. TO TRUST OPENLY IN GOD’S CARE MEANS THAT WE WILL BE
DIFFERENT IN THE STORM THAN THOSE WHO DO NOT KNOW GOD. (Acts 27:20, Acts 27:24)
3. God will use our
trusting Him in the storm to bear witness to many.
“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious
privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love—then make
that day count!” ― Steve Maraboli
Then, one day, as life as I knew it crumbled before my eyes,
I started to awaken. I knew that unless I let go of the fear and anger, I
wouldn’t be able to move forward into love and happiness. I loved myself too
much to remain stuck in this dark place. - unknown
Galatians 1:10 ESV For am I now seeking the approval of man,
or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man,
I would not be a servant of Christ.
Romans 12:2 ESV Do not be conformed to this world, but be
transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what
is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Matthew 5:9 (NIV) Blessed
are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
Romans 8:14 For
those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God.
2 Corinthians 13:11
Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration,
encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and
peace will be with you.
Prayer of St Francis
Lord, make me an
instrument of your peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
